Friday 19 August 2016

To Greet or Not to Greet

More often than not, when women get together we talk about everything. From our husbands to our children, a relative or even a neighbor. Not necessarily in a bad way. We share our highs and lows and issues that bother us as well as make us laugh.
For some time now, one of the major issues hat has remained on the table is -pleasantries.
For example, a friend of mine had shared with me how another friend of mine wouldn't say hello to her if they bumped into each other. Quite a number of others agreed with her about this particular lady too. I found this really hard to believe because I felt that this un-greeting friend was quite a warm person.
It wasn't long after our conversation that I bumped into this lady friend of mine. I had seen her not too far off  but she hadn't seen me. She walked past me and didn't acknowledge me at all. I wanted to call out to her, to say hi and ask if she really hadn't seen me, but I listened to a still quiet voice inside of my head to just let it go.

Later that night, I contemplated on it all and the more I though about it, the more I got convinced of so many things.
Firstly, who do you consider a friend? You see a true friend would never do that-pass by without exchanging pleasantries. Although this lady was part of my small bible group and we exchanged pleasantries at the group including private messages to each other, she wasn't really my friend, and I don't mean that in a bad way. For that reason, I was wrong to expect more from her. 
Another thought was, did I know what was going through her mind at the time she passed by me? What if she felt the same about me? I mean -what if she also felt like I was deliberating not greeting her as well.
I was beat up by these thoughts in my head.

There are some cases though, even among believers which brings me so much sadness. It feels like sometimes, especially among women, that we are in competition with each other. Some people want to be greeted first. (Another thought to that is, they might have been in the habit of greeting people and then got cold replies.)
Some do not want to be greeted. (Another thought again to that is, They want to remain unseen and don't really want any interaction with others maybe due to bad experiences, and so they build a wall around themselves.)
However, some wanted to be greeted a certain way-kind of like the Pharisees. Loud and respectfully in the presence of others, so that they may be seen to be worthy of honour.

What is more beautiful than a warm greeting shared by women? A hello to say I see you. A how are you? to say I care about you. A good morning to brighten someone's day. What is the big deal in exchanging pleasantries? 
You don't have to know someone to greet them, you don't have to be friends with that person to greet, you don't even have to stop them from doing whatever it is they were doing just to greet. 
Greeting someone is one of the easiest and simplest things to do. As you walk past someone, smile and say good morning, good afternoon, hello, good bye, have a beautiful day.

My mother once shared a story with me, about a distant relative. She had bumped into her on the way to her aunts house, so she stopped to exchange pleasantries. Seeing that she didn't look quite right, she invited her to go along with her. Her distant relative obliged although quite unwilling at first, but my mother persisted. 
Later that evening, after they had had dinner together, she admitted to my mother and her aunt that she had been going home to kill herself when my mother bumped into her. She was fed up with life and had been miserable with it. She told them that just by being in their company, catching up, laughing and eating together, it dawned on her that life was far too precious and extremely worth living.

Your "Hello!" Good morning, That's a beautiful skirt you have on, just simple pleasantries  won't take anything from you. It could save someone's life. It could lift someone's spirit, It could revive something dead in someone. 
There is an enormous deal in a greeting. It costs you nothing. Be cheerful and fill the world with sunshine and love. 
Greet the person next to you and if they don't respond, don't give up on them, life may be dealing harshly with them, always remember that. Stay Blessed.


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